Another Monday and another induction into Utter Wonder's Hall of Fame. I'm proud to enshrine the first married couple (newlyweds, no less!) into the hall, Bob and Courtney Neville. The Neville's realize that to achieve your utmost potential personal power you must put yourself out there for all the world to see. (Or in this case 0.74 people to see.) Some scoff at this idea, but they are too busy training for their next ultimate fight to understand how appearing on Utter Wonder changes your life for the good.

The Neville's have had a particularly tough go at fulfilling their utmost potential personal power because their name has been co-opted by those darn musicians The Neville Brothers. Those guys have dished out their Cajun voodoo cult music for far too long now. What's with them anyway? And that Aaron Neville guy, he has to be by far the most popular entertainer with a large mole on his face of all-time? Why him? I can name at least a half-dozen other entertainers with big moles on their faces that deserve to be more popular than squeaky voiced Aaron Neville. No, I can't name them now; just trust me, though, if given proper Googling time I can. Is that so hard for you to do, to trust me? Why be such a stickler? Can't you just take my word for it? I'm not defensive. No, I don't sound defensive either; how can one sound defensive when one speaks the truth? Plus my back isn't up against some fence or wall; it's feeling quite non-defensive and comfortable, actually. Here let me lean back in my highly ergonomic office chair to prove to you just how comfortable my back is. There. You see? Complete comfort. Nothing defensive about this posture here. My posture speaks calm, coolness, and collectivity. Triple C! That's my posture: triple C! That would make a great name for a rap group, or like a combination rap/soul group, like TLC, except with all men. Why all men? I'm not sure; "Triple C" just seems to fit better for an all men group. They'd all be real handsome and have great abs and make all the tweeny girls scream. In person they'd be charismatic, magnetic, and dreamy, but a bit shorter than they appear in the video.

I wish I could relate to Bob and Courtney's name plight, but I can't for there aren't too many other imposing Monks out there. Sure there's this guy, but classical music will only take you so far in this world if you don't have a blog. I'm the only Monks I know with a blog, therefore I've achieved my utmost potential personal power. Classical schmassical. Without a blog, conducting classical music is a life full of nothing but a whole lotta of blah-blah and concert halls full of old white people. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Both blah-blah and concert halls full of old white people have there place, like Utah, but they're not for this Monks.

Tony Danza! Tony Danza has a mole on his face and he's a way better entertainer than silly Aaron Neville. Tony Danza is a triple threat: he acts, he sings, he dances. Aaron can sing, dance a little, too, but I saw him on Sesame Street once and he doesn't have an expressive bone in his body. He made Ernie look like DeNiro. Sure Tony Danza's mole isn't nearly as large or grotesque as Aaron Neville's but he plays characters named "Tony" with the best of them. Okay, I stole that joke from some VH1 countdown show. I don't remember which one, but I cited it so that should be enough. Don't get all NYT on me, K? Danke.

But enough about Tony Danza; this entry is about the Nevilles. The real Nevilles. The Nevilles without mammoth sized moles on their faces. So let's take a moment and gaze into the fully realized utmost potential personal power faces of Bob and Courtney Neville. Courtney is an elementary edu. major; Bob's a self identified "tech support geek". Don't they just ooze utmost potential personal power? It may have something to do with their leis. It's hard not to ooze powerfulness in a lei. That's why I refuse to wear them. I want people to see me ooze my utmost potential personal power on my own, without the aid of a necklace of tacky looking tropical flowers. But that's just me. Bob and Courtney play by their own rules, like deeming it best to skip the water and go straight for the coladas. Water is for sissies and weaklings, Bob and Courtney say. They drink fru-fru drinks with umbrellas in them or they drink nothing at all! You gotta respect a couple that knows what they want and how they want it. Most importantly, Bob and Courtney know that being in Utter Wonder's Hall of Fame is a high honor full of perks and advantages that would make your Stop and Shop discount card wet its pants.

Okay, alright: Tony Danza doesn't have a mole on his face. I just made that up because he seems the type that would. Can't you imagine him having a mole on his face? I can. I am right now. I'm snorkeling with Tony in the Bahamas. He's wearing a red suit; mine is blue. Oh, what fun we're having. I love snorkeling. Oh look, a pretty fish! I love observing pretty fish. Tony looks silly in a snorkeling mask. I mean he still is boyishly handsome, but it's just that the mask scrunches his face together in a funny way. Wait. Is his face mole bleeding? Oh well. Here come the sharks!

Ah, well, back to reality--back to Bob and Courtney! For sending me their pic, Bob and Courtney received a signed copy of a fan letter I wrote to Star Jones. And of course they have now been officially listed as a member of Utter Wonder's Hall of Fame. Congratulations! Readers, you could become a member and receive a Star Jones fan letter, too. Just send me your pic and you will be on your way to achieving your utmost potential personal power. I don't know what that means really either. Just go with it. It sounds cool and powerful. That's what's most important. Focus on the important things. Like my blog. Good. All set? Then send away.

This post is dedicated to Jewel's dance teacher.