Well, I'm proud to announce that a reader has been brave and courageous enough to submit their photograph to Utter Wonder. Unlike other people, Miss Lisa Rocci understands the honor of appearing on this site. She is savvy in knowing the personal power attained by being put on display before the nation of 2.74 Utter Wonder readers. More savvy than even me, for I've vowed never to put my picture on this site. Some may call this hypocritical, I call it genius. Alright, genius is a stretch, probably. I just like using that phrase. So sue me. You probably are the type that would. Man, you and your litigation. All I try to do is run an entertaining blog and you get all F. Lee Bailey on me. Well, it's unbecoming. There, the defense rests. Cue "Law and Order" music. Roll credits.

But I'm not here today to defend my choice of words; I'm here today to enshrine Miss Lisa Rocci into Utter Wonder's Hall of Fame. Let's take a moment to gaze upon the bold eyes of Lisa Rocci, for in them I see a love of all things hip-happenin' and a passion for photocopying. Please, if you will, stare lovingly at her proud, beaming face full of a certain pride that says "I am Lisa Rocci. Stare lovingly at my proud, beaming face!" Yes, the detached hands and arms in the background attempting to make shadow puppets in a brightly lit room are a bit of a distraction, but not enough to miss noticing how smart and sharp looking Lisa makes wearing a knapsack look. I can't help fantasizing about rendezvousing with her in a Kinko�s. We'd make fun of all the Kinko�s worker people in their silly blue aprons and sloping foreheads, and then we�d illegally copy some copyrighted material, like a page from Star Jones's autobiography or a lame essay about a dying pet from somebody�s overrated blog. Something tells me Lisa knows her way around a copy machine, if you know what I mean, heh-heh...No, really, do you know what I mean? I mean I bet she knows which buttons to press and stuff to make a copy. I always freeze up at public copy machines, worrying that I'll press the wrong button or feed the paper in an incorrect way.

With her picture, Lisa Rocci also included a bit of her own commentary on her photo. While this move stepped outside of the guidelines for submitting a photo to Utter Wonder, I found her words to be worthy of sharing with the 1.74 rest of you (I did the math: since Lisa wrote this herself it isn't new to her, so in effect I'm not sharing it with her because she has already seen it. 2.74 readers minus 1 reader equals 1.74 readers. Thank you. I owe my entire mathematics prowess to watching hours and hours of Mathnet on PBS when I was an adolescent. You see, I was a latch key kid, and while through therapy I've learned this set me back emotionally on many levels, there were positives that came from it. Like watching Mathnet on PBS for hours and hours.):

Here is my picture. You can post it on your blog and write whatever you like about it. I'll even point out a few of the dorkier features of the photo:

Lisa Rocci
http://lisarocci.blogspot.com

In addition to being inducted into Utter Wonder's Hall of Fame, I sent Lisa Rocci a signed copy of a fan letter I wrote to Star Jones. No doubt the letter has been framed and sniffed for any lingering scent of me because as all my readers know: I am one fine-smelling man. A signed copy of a fan letter I wrote Star Jones could be yours as well, Utter Wonder readers. Send me your picture. Make me proud. Make yourself proud. Even if your comments are only half as witty and self-deprecatory than Lisa's I'll probably include them anyway. Just think: not only your picture on Utter Wonder, but your words, too. No swear words please. Yes, I know I swear on occasion, but that's just the street in me. You can take the boy out of the streets, but you can't take the streets out of the boy. Dawg. Peace out.

This post is dedicated to never having been in an IHOP at 2 o�clock in the morning.