#5. Boooooooorrrrrinnnnnng! This guy might be okay if he's trying to be "Anemic Elvis", but I don't think he is. And even if he is trying to be "Anemic Elvis" that's kind of lame. "Anemic Elvis" doesn't exactly inspire the kids.

#4. His outfit is okay, but I don't know what is up with that can of beans he's holding. I like beans, I like beans a lot, actually. But something about an Elvis holding a can of beans makes me nauseous. Not sure why. Just does. Okay, I can't look at it any longer: feel like I'm on a boat watching a Lars Von Trier film. Let's move on.

#3. Elvis impersonations have been around for so long that any attempt at irony simply falls flat. Even an "Amish Elvis" seems contrived. However, I am optimistic about the upcoming debut of the "Amish Rick James". I'm on rumspringa, bitch!

#2. Face is right, but everything else fails. Where are the sunglasses? Where are the rhinestones? Where are the downers? Pathetic.

#1. Pathetic. Absolutely pathetic. This guy is one tool belt away from being a one-man Village People impersonator. He's an embarrassment to the craft of impersonating Elvis. Makes me sick.

This post is dedicated to Ringo impersonators.