Hey, cow! You think you're all that, but you ain't. You think you're so great 'cause you can milk and whatnot, but that ain't no big thing. I have nipples, too. They don't produce milk, but then again I ain't no stupid fat cow. Ha-ha!

Well, what do we have here? Looks like we got us another lazy-ass pig. What gives you the right to be so lazy, lazy-ass pig? You work hard all day like the rest of us? I don't think so, fool! You're a pig! That's right: a pig! Wut you gonna do about it, son? Huh? Wut? Wut?...I didn't think so. Chump.

What, you think you're too cool to hold still for a picture for me, horse? You think you're some high-fashion model too good and pretty to have a picture taken by me? Shoot, you ain't nothing, horse, nothing but a souped-up donkey. That's right; I called you a donkey, fool. Sucka'!

Yo, McNugget, what's shakin'? You got somethin' to say to me, fool? What's that? Un-uh, no sir, I ain't your bitch! No, no, you're my bitch, fool! You lucky you behind that cage, son, 'cause if not I'd be cock-a-doodlin-do your raggedy ass!

Somebody thinks they be all high and mighty wit their big tires and whatnot. Shit, that ain't nothing, tractor. My daddy gots tires way bigger than that! Way bigger! And he ain't even no tractor. Ho! Snap!

Sure, you might be taller than me now, sunflower, but let's see where we are come wintertime, fool! Your ass will be dead and buried and I'll be kickin' it by my fireplace playing Madden on my Xbox! Boo-ya!

Mad respect, goat...it's your world, homes...not lookin' to cause no trouble wit you, man. I'm just visiting the farm, is all. I'll be on my way soon....please don't eat me....thanks.

This post is dedicated to hayrides.