It was a great year for me making and eating omelettes. I could have easily expanded this list to my top seven or eight omelettes ("omelets" for you Red Staters) of the year, but I decided against it because I don't want to spend all my XBOX-playing time writing about omelettes. So here are my top five omelettes of the year. Enjoy!

5. Cheese Omelette (prepared and eaten on May 3rd)
This omelette almost didn't make the list, but in the end it did, mainly due to its exceptional fluff factor. Fluffy omelettes are an acquired taste, as many people find fluffy eggness in their mouth hard to take. Not me, though. The fluffier the better is what I say. 'Course I have to be in the right mood. Nobody wants a fluffy omelette after working out or watching a piece about Star Jones' wedding on Entertainment Tonight. But under the right circumstances, like say following a good cry or accidentally pouring a quart of milk into a bowl of eggs, a fluffy omellette really hits the spot.

4. Ham, Mushroom, and Cheese Omelette (prepared and eaten on February 14th)
I made this omelette for My Lady for Valentine's Day. I surprised her by serving breakfast in bed. She was appreciative until she realized there were mushrooms in it. She hates mushrooms. I forgot that. So she picked the mushrooms out, leaving a big pile of mushrooms on her plate, perfectly good mushrooms. So I leaned over and grabbed them off her lame-ass plate and said "Well, I'll eat the fucking mushrooms if you won't." They tasted awesome.

3. Pepper and Onion Omelette (prepared and eaten on October 26th)
You really can't go wrong with a pepper and onion omelette. It's a great combo that works well in pretty much any food, especially with cheese. But with this particular pepper and onion omelette there wasn't any cheese. I forgot to put it in. Also forgot to butter the pan before I cooked the omelette. Don't know where my head was that day. Still, the omelette turned out fine. It was dry and crunchy, but fine nonetheless, as like I said before, you really can't ruin a pepper and onion anything.

2. Eggless Omelette (prepared and eaten November 10th)
If there's one thing I'm known for it's being a better than average dresser. If there are two things I'm known for it's being a better than average dresser and speaking in funny foreign accents. If there are three things I'm known for it's being a better than average dresser, speaking in funny foreign accents, and being creative in the kitchen. I think the day back in November when I made an eggless omelette while wearing my vintage Members Only jacket and speaking in a funny Chinese accent is a testament to that. We were out of eggs ("Ow of egg!") but still I was dedicated to make an omelette. So I whipped up a concoction of mayonnaise ("Man-nay!"), marshmallow (Mar-mel-owe!", and chicken ("Chicken!") and made the first ever Eggless Omelette. And through it all I didn't get my Members Only jacket soiled once! It was all so fantastic! I love funny foreign accents!

1. Mystery Omelette (prepared on April 17th, 2003 and eaten on December 20th, 2004)
That's right; today's omelette is the best omelette of the year. Some might think I'm being a bit cocky, but I'm not. Today's omelette was fantastic. I just finished eating it minutes ago. And the great thing about it is that I still have no idea what was in the thing. On the night of April 17 I got real drunk. I forget why, but man, did I put one on! I also got into a wicked fight with My Lady. Seems she didn't approve of the way I watched television and made fun of those silly sounding people in Univision and drank wine coolers all day long or something. (Women!) So, in a drunken rage I escaped to the kitchen and threw together a concoction of whatever I could find. (Omelette making always centers me.) So I set out to create the best omelette of all-time that night. That would show her! Unfortunately I passed out before I finished making it. My Lady cleaned up after me (out of guilt, probably) and stored the ingredients for the omelette in the freezer. And it wasn't until this morning that I found them, so I figured what the hay, and gave it a shot. The green-blue coloration was a little unsettling at first, but after a couple of bites I fell in love with this omelette. And the great thing about it is that the omelette fell in love with me too. It said it wanted me to be its man for the rest of its life. I was terribly flattered. Then I ate the rest if it. Mmm-mmm good! There's blood in my stool, but who cares? I just ate the best omelette of 2004!

This post is dedicated to financial challanges.