I saw the Oscar-winning film Born Into Brothels this weekend. Not sure what all the hubbub was about it. It wasn't erotic at all. You'd think a movie with the word "brothel" in it would have at the very least have one or two sexy scenes in it, but not this one. Goes to show that you can't trust those sneaky movie people; they always promise one thing and then give you another. And let me tell you, there's nothing sexy about a bunch of poor kids with cameras. Nothing.

How the film won the Oscar, I'll never know. It wouldn't even be worthy of a late night spot on Cinemax or HBO. I mean, at least with those movies you know that if the title has the words "Bimbos" or" Cheerleaders" or the phrases "Forbidden Pleasure" or "Carnal Desire" in them, you're gonna see some bimbos and some cheerleaders and some forbidden pleasure and some carnal desire.

Unfortunately, it can work the other way, too. For instance, HBO has a new show titled Cathouse, and I tuned the other night expecting to find a whimsical show about a house full of kitties. What I found instead was a documentary which follows the real-life exploits of "working girls" at the Bunny Ranch (with no actual bunnies, of course) in Nevada. It was a real disappointment--all nine times I watched it.

So let that be today's lesson for you: never trust a movie or television show by its title. Now please excuse me: I'm off to read that famous novel about angry fruit.

This post is dedicated to Walken for Prez.