We haven't had a "two for the price of one" UWHOF induction in a quite a while. I'm pleased to have another. Not only because it's double the bravery and courage and intestinal fortitude, but because it means I get to eat two dozen doughnuts.

You see, after an induction I usually reward myself with a dozen doughnuts. I feel that's the least I can do for being the vessel that supplies yet more bravery and courage and intestinal fortitude into the blogosphere. But on a day like today, when there are two inductees, I can double my pleasure and eat two dozen doughnuts. It's fantastic. I love doughnuts. I've already started eating them. I'm on my seventh. Yum! And no matter what you might think, this will not hurt my blog shame diet.

Why, you ask? Well, because I'm not on my blog shame diet anymore. That was dumb. Diets are dumb. I hate dumb things. Dumb things are stupid. So I stopped. Now I'm eating what I want when I want. Like doughnuts. Here goes my eighth. Oh, sweet glory! Who cares if I'm a little poofy in my mid-section? My Lady loves me for who I am. She's always said she'd stay with me even if I was big and fat. So now I'm putting her to the test. Here's hoping she passes.

Ninth doughnut, coming right up!

Today's inductees are Marc Peacock Brush and Jennifer Meyer. I bet they love their doughnuts, too. I mean, who doesn't love doughnuts? Bad people, probably. Yeah, I bet all the bad people in the world hate doughnuts. God, why do bad people have to be so difficult? Can't they just let us good people enjoy doughnuts? Jeeze.

Sorry, I know I talk about doughnuts a lot on here. I just love them so much. They are the best things ever. And they are so not dumb. Diets are dumb; doughnuts are not.

All right, enough doughnut talk: back to our inductees: Marc Peacock Brush and Jennifer Meyer. They are both writers. The UWHOF is full of writers, so they should fit right in. Beside having the best name of all-time, Marc Peacock Brush is editor-in-chief of Wandering Army, a fine literary site. His own work has appeared in various online journals, like this one and that one. Jennifer Meyer is a contributing editor to Wandering Army, and received something called an "MFA in creative writing". Not sure what that is, but it sounds cool. She also may or may not be the same Jennifer Meyer that does fantasy drawings. My guess is that she is not that Jennifer Meyer, but still, it gives me the opportunity to link to this, so I thank her for sharing the same name.

Now, let's do like we always do during an induction and stare at our inductees' photo for no less than five seconds. Begin!

One-one doughnut...

Two-one doughnut...

Three-one doughnut...

Four-one doughnut...

Five-one doughnut...

Well done! So, what do you think of our new inductees' photo? I think it's very arty. The blue sky, the church, and the low-angle all make for a very arty shot. Then, of course, there's the camp value of having a midget photographer. Yes, clearly a lot went into this UWHOF induction photo. Gotta admire that. Who knew that midgets could be photographers? The world is full of surprises. Wonder where Marc and Jennifer found their midget photographer. Is there a section for them in the phone book? Perhaps they won him in an auction. Regardless, it's great arty photo.

When you think about it, midgets make pretty good arty photographers because they see things from such a different and midgety perspective. It's almost an unfair advantage, actually. All us normal people have to take pictures from regular heights and midgets get to take them from way down there by the floor. I hope they make some sort of provision for this in photo competitions, otherwise midgets would be winning them left and right.

Anyway, without further ado I hereby officially induct Marc Peacock Brush and Jennifer Meyer in Utter Wonder's Hall of Fame. As an added bonus for today's induction, I've uploaded the '05 version of the UWHOF's theme song to the Hall, so now you can listen to it as you scroll through all that bravery and courage and intestinal fortitude. I dare you not to cry.

If you would like to join the Hall, just send me an actual-honest-to-god photo of yourself and soon you'll be featured among all the brave and courageous and intestinal blah-blah-blah. For your effort you'll receive a signed copy of a fan letter I sent Star Jones.

Alrighty, that's it for today. Time for me to get back to my doughnuts. I'm on my 15th. Only nine more to go after this one. That's kind of sad. Those first 14 were great fun. Now they're gone. Sigh. Oh well. No use crying over eaten doughnuts, especially when there are more left. Big and fat, here I come!

This post is dedicated to Bill Buckner.

***There's still time to submit a caption for the hardest Doodleday Caption Contest ever.***