Sniff-sniff. You smell that? Sniff-sniff. Could it be? Sniff-sniff. Yes, it is: it's the stench of bravery and courage and intestinal fortitude! That could only mean that it's time for another induction into the UWHOF!

yippee.

Sorry, that yippee could have had more pizzazz, but the Brazilians are just outside my window and I'm feeling kind of self-conscious right now. They're taking forever to paint the house. Ideally, I would have liked to have run around the room bare-chested shouting "yippee" from the bottom of my lungs, but the Brazilians lurk and I fear they already think I'm weird as it is, so I'll hold back.

But rest assured my lack of excitement has nothing to do with today's inductee, Justin Kahn. The name might ring a bell given his writing appears all over the Internet. Yes, he's yet another writer looking for a little free publicity by applying to the Hall, but I don't mind. This is just another example of why I'm a tool, a better than average-looking tool who wears trendy T-shirts which--no matter what His Lady say--don't make him look like he's trying too hard to be twenty-four years old again.

Justin is a very funny writer. For proof, I offer you this, this and this. He also has a blog, but I can't attest to how funny that is because I am very busy person and don't have time to read blogs.

So let's do like we always do for an induction and stare at Justin's photo for a period of time no shorter than five seconds. Begin!

One-one Ronaldo...

Two-one Ronaldinho...

Three-one Cafu...

Four-one Rubinho...

Five-one Kaka....

Well done. So what do we think of Justin's photo? I know, you can hardly see his face. That sort of goes against the point of the UWHOF. Still, we can see most of him. So while its not the most brave and courageous and intestinal fortitudinal pic in the world, he still deserves some credit for sending it in. Plus it looks like there's a person behind him hiding under a sheet. That's kind of scary. I couldn't handle living with somebody who hides under a sheet. So Justin gets some brave/courage/intestinal fortitude points for that.

Why is that guy under that sheet anyway? Maybe he has that disease where you're allergic to light. What a bummer. I would hate to have that. I wonder how he sees through the sheet. He must bump into things all the time. I bet a lot of the furniture is bolted down.

Without further ado, I hereby officially induct Justin Kahn into Utter Wonder's Hall of Fame. For his bravery and courage and intestinal fortitude Justin has received a signed copy of a fan letter I sent Star Jones that is more than suitable for framing. It's really awesome. I gave a whole bunch to the Brazilians. They love them. I think. Who knows with them really. They act is if they've never seen a man watch The View without a shirt on before. I don't get them.

As always, you can have a letter of your very own. Just send me an actual photo of yourself and you'll be on your way to Internet pseudo-fame.