There comes a time when a warrior has to be warrior, and for this warrior that time was yesterday. For to get what you want you sometimes have to slap on the war paint and go out there and get it, and that's exactly what I did. Except without the war paint. I was all out; I used it all up while making a six-egg omelet the day before. But still, I didn't let that stop me. Instead I put on some imaginary war paint (which really is just as good and makes me wonder why I spend $6.95 on a jar of real war paint) and hit my local Best Buy at 8:00 am yesterday morning to buy a Nintendo Wii.

I am a warrior!

Three and a half hours in the cold, people--that's what I withstood yesterday. It wasn't pretty. But sometimes being a warrior isn't pretty. In fact, being a warrior is often very ugly--and very difficult. I mean, three and a half hours in 20-degree weather! Without any chapstick! In line with a bunch of 20-something guys who live with their moms!

I wouldn't wish that on anybody. The whole morning was a testament to my remarkable endurance. I had to brave not only the harsh winter winds and blinding winter sun, but also the endless discussions about World of Warcraft, and the best types of Belkin routers, and why Babylon 5 was the most underrated television show of all-time.

It. Was. Not. Pretty.

Yet through it all I was a warrior. I laughed at their jokes about Commodore 64s and the "crazy" comments they've left on Kotaku. I feigned interest in their discussion on favorite ways they've hacked a Roomba. I even gave them advice on how to talk nice to a lady. In short, I was a warrior from start to finish.

And then finally, after 210 minutes in the bitter cold, I was able to purchase my Wii. I couldn't feel my toes, my lips were fried to a crisp, and I reeked of geek, but it didn't matter: I had my Wii. And despite being talked into the $40 2-year replacement plan by the dashing young salesman at the register, I was proud of myself. I had achieved my goal. I had set out to get a Wii and I did just that.

I am a warrior!

So for the foreseeable future I will do what any other warrior does after a victory such as this one: I will play video games and eat chips and dip until I feel like a useless piece of lowered expectation. Wish me luck!

This post is dedicated to Mother Teresa.