If all goes as planned it promises to be a special Valentine's Day for me today. That's if My Lady comes through, of course. I've been planting a seed for some time about what I want for Valentine's Day ($10,000 cash), dropping little hints every day or so the last few months, so I'd say the odds are in my favor that I'll get what I want.

I have no idea how she'll come up with $10,000, but she's usually pretty good about getting me what I want. As long as it doesn't involve selling my Wii on eBay, I don't really care how she gets the money. I just want it. I'm not even sure what I'll do with it. I just want it to have and to hold. I told her I wanted the entire sum in $1 bills, so it would look like a lot of money, from a distance at least. It will be so cool to look like I have a lot of money. People at the Stop 'N Shop will finally respect me!

$10,000 might seem like a lot to ask for a Valentine's gift, but you're not in love with me. Being in love with me is an awesome thing. You really haven't loved somebody until you've been in love with me. Loving me is spectacular. It makes you feel like you can do anything, like run a marathon, or become a doctor, or rob the ATM just around the corner from where you live.

That's not to imply, of course, that My Lady is right now as I type robbing the ATM around the corner from where we live. No, not at all. I don't even think ATMs have $10,000 in them. I mean, right? All I'm saying is that if an ATM did have $10,000 in it and you were in love with me you'd be beating the shit out of the thing trying to get me my money.

So, yeah, loving me is really, really special.

Anyway, here's hoping My Lady doesn't let me down. I forgot to get her something for Valentine's Day, but clearing the table after dinner every so often has to count for something, right?

This post is dedicated to ventricles.