The long national nightmare is over: Our Wii is back from the shop and is as good as new. So you can go ahead and blow out those candlelit vigils you've been holding for me. Thanks for that, by the way. You really went the extra mile. Feels great to be loved so much. Especially by total strangers.

The timing of our Wii's return couldn't have been better, as Wii Fit came out this week. I got it on the first day of its release. (That's what makes me a PLAYA, yo.) There were only two left at Target and I snatched one up. I'm smooth like that.

Wii Fit is pretty nifty. The balance board rocks. It measures your body weight and whatnot. My BMI is totally in the normal range, so clearly the benefits of my blog shame diet are still paying off. I have the strength of ten men, really. Ain't no thang. Is what it is. Don't be intimidated by me. Thanks.

So this Memorial Day weekend all will be back to normal. I'll be playing Wii Fit up in my Man-Attic while ignoring the cries below of my children wanting me to play jigsaw puzzles and board games with them. How annoying is that? Very annoying. It's the 21st century, little me's. Plus I've paid my jigsaw puzzle and board game dues these last few Wii-less weeks. By my calculations I don't have to do another jigsaw puzzle or play another board game until Thanksgiving. That's what I announced over the home intercom anyway. They never replied back, but I assume they heard me. Hope they heard the order of french toast and bacon I just yelled down at them, too.

Have a pleasant three-day weekend. See you Tuesday.

This post is dedicated to rheumatoid arthritis.